A Holy Experiment

I was reading Oswald Chambers this morning, this is what he said:

. . . come, follow Me —Luke 18:22

Where our individual desire dies and sanctified surrender lives. One of the greatest hindrances in coming to Jesus is the excuse of our own individual temperament. We make our temperament and our natural desires barriers to coming to Jesus. Yet the first thing we realize when we do come to Jesus is that He pays no attention whatsoever to our natural desires. We have the idea that we can dedicate our gifts to God. However, you cannot dedicate what is not yours. There is actually only one thing you can dedicate to God, and that is your right to yourself (see Romans 12:1). If you will give God your right to yourself, He will make a holy experiment out of you— and His experiments always succeed. The one true mark of a saint of God is the inner creativity that flows from being totally surrendered to Jesus Christ. In the life of a saint there is this amazing Well, which is a continual Source of original life. The Spirit of God is a Well of water springing up perpetually fresh. A saint realizes that it is God who engineers his circumstances; consequently there are no complaints, only unrestrained surrender to Jesus. Never try to make your experience a principle for others, but allow God to be as creative and original with others as He is with you.

If you abandon everything to Jesus, and come when He says, “Come,” then He will continue to say, “Come,” through you. You will go out into the world reproducing the echo of Christ’s “Come.” That is the result in every soul who has abandoned all and come to Jesus.

Have I come to Him? Will I come now?

As I was reading this, a still small voice asked this question, “Are you being creative, or just doing the same old thing over and over again expecting a different result?”

This caused me to look a little deeper at myself and ask Christ the question, “How have I not submitted to you Lord?”

My prayer is, “Lord, show me the areas in my life that I have not submitted. Give me your heart so I may better serve you while I am in this world, make me Your HOly experience.”

Blessings,

Fly fishing and ministry

Good morning,
I pray the day is finding you well.

Laurie, my wife, and I moved to a nice little house on a river about a year ago.

Since I moved to the house I have had this romantic idea of catching a steelhead: for those of you who are not fisherman, a steelhead is a fish. It is an amazing fish that I hear is a lot of fun to catch.

I say I hear because I have never caught one!

I am a fly fisherman; for those of you who are not fisherman, fly fishing is not fishing for flies, it is a type of fishing. If you want to now more about fly fishing watch the movie, "A river runs through it."

I have this romantic idea of getting up in the morning, grabbing my gear, going to the river, catching a steelhead, taking a picture of my catch, letting it go (the nice thing about fishing is you do not have to kill a fish to have fun). I do like to eat fish, so I am sure there will be times when I bring one home and eat it, sounds slightly barbaric just saying it.

Since we moved into the house I have thought about finding all my stuff and going fishing. I spent the last few days going through unopened boxes, well actually I opened them to go through them, but they were not open before I opened them. I found all my gear and started making plans.

I have this romantic idea of catching a steelhead.

I say romantic, because in all actuality, it takes on average a thousand casts to catch one. In reality I will be on the river, strategizing, picking my spot and casting, casting, casting...finally to tired to cast anymore I will pack up my gear and come home empty handed.

Ministry is a lot like fly fishing for steelhead.

When we first enter ministry we have a romantic notion that we will have this powerfully impactful ministry, one that has tangible rewards that can be easily measured.

In reality ministry is much harder than one imagines.
In reality ministry is much dirtier than one imagines.
In reality ministry can hurt.

As one spends more, and more time in ministry, one either begins to see success in the small things, the little things, or continues to feel defeated and ultimately burns out trying to do what they think is successful.

It has been my experience with Christ that He is not impressed with the "Big Deal." Christ asks us to, first be in daily relationship with HIm, and through this relationship come into relationship with those that come into our lives, whom ever they may be, and help them see Him.

Ministry and fly fishing are a lot alike. Many, many casts, a few fish.

The whole time I am fly fishing, I am talking with God.

The whole time I am with someone, God is talking with me.

As I go through my day, I will continue to let go and take peace in the fact that God is using me to help people for His sake.

As you go through your day may I suggest that you measure your success in the little things and take peace in the fact that God is using you to help people for His sake.

Blessings,

Making Room for God; a Forced Sabbath.

Good morning,
I pray the day is finding you well.

Making room for God; a forced sabbath.

Last Friday around 10:30am I was sitting in the YMCA membership office, checking on membership staff. I had already had a meeting, two counseling appointments, played basketball with Tony and Scotty (playing basketball with Tony and Scotty is a daily routine. Tony was a star athlete in high school and was all set to go to college on a basketball scholarship when he got into a bad car accident that changed his life forever. He has a brain injury that has left him with short-term memory lose and the emotional state of a 17-year old. Scotty was placed on oxygen when he was born and cannot speak. He has the mind of a four year old. Tony is 45-years old. Scotty is in his twenties.) I had made my morning rounds and was finishing up with membership. It had been a very good week; one that included speaking at summer camp staff trainings, connecting with faith community members, counseling sessions and finding resources for people with problems that ranged from relational problems, domestic violence, unemployment and homelessness, and attempted suicide.

I had been working until almost 10pm every night.

I was sitting in the membership office, checking in with the membership staff.

A typical check-in goes like this:
Me, "Good morning."
Staff, "Good morning."
Me, "How are you doing today."
Staff, "Ok." (This is actually an opportunity for me.)
Me, "Just ok? How come you are just ok?
Then the staff will tell me something that is bothering them that is making their day just ok. It gives me the opportunity to talk with them about what is bothering them and hopefully reframe things and refocus them.

I was sitting in the membership office, checking in with the membership staff.

I sat down in a chair, and said, "Good morning."

This is what happened.

The staff turns and looks at me and says, "Roger, you look terrible."

I am not one of those guys that spends a lot of time in the bathroom making sure every hair is in place before I go out the door, but I do shower, shave, comb my hair and try to look decent for people, so being told I look "terrible" set me back a bit. I sat there hoping that I would get an explanation, I did.
A board member who was walking by just then stops in to say hello.

The board member looks at me and says, "Roger, you look terrible."

They proceeded to tell me about the bags under my eyes, and that I looked exhausted.

I am thinking to myself, "Thanks a lot."

Then something amazing happened.

One of the staff asked to see my phone.

I gave her my phone.

She then called my appointments that I had scheduled for the weekend and explained that I was exhausted, she went on to tell them that the staff was worried about my health and that I was to do nothing but rest this weekend. She then emailed my wife to explain that I was looking very tired and that I should rest.

I was shocked.

I was amazed.

Both the board member and the staff proceeded to tell me, "Roger, you spend your entire day looking after us. You take on the troubles of the staff, members and community. We are only looking after you."

I admitted that I was feeling a little run down.

Sometimes God shows up in the funniest places.

Sometimes we see Him in the blue sky and clouds.

Sometimes we see Him when we walk in the country.

Sometimes we see Him in a staff member and a board member.

I went home, my wife met me at the door and made me take a nap.

It is Sunday morning, I have rested and feel much better. I will spend the rest of the day puttering in my yard and thanking God for the people that care enough to tell me when to go home.

One of the dangers of living your calling is that it does not feel like work.

I counsel people; staff, members, those that I talk with on the importance of taking a sabbath.

I am terrible at taking a sabbath.

I must learn to follow what I ask others to do.

Thank you God for showing up through a couple of people at the YMCA.

Blessings,

Dramastically

We have a funny language. I think our communication would be clearer and more concise if we had clear expectations of what our words mean when we say them. I know that we have had the “word” police in the past but as effective as these police people were, as passionate as they always seemed to be, after all every one of these police were unpaid volunteers, their efforts went for not.

Often times, I think that if we had fewer words or had actually come up with our own language instead of stealing words and phrases from every other language in the world, we would have an easier time of it.

I was having coffee with a friend of mine today, I will call her Lindsey, anyway, Lindsey was telling me about her day, which really does seem to be a vital part of any counseling session, and she said, “The things that we are doing will ‘dramastically’ impact us in a good way.”

I looked at her and said, “Dramastically? Is that a combination of dramatically and fantastically?”

She just looked at me, smiled, and said, “Yes.”

So often, when we talk with one another we use terms and phrases that others may not understand.

There is an old saying that goes like this, “Listen with the intent to listen and not the intent to respond.”

There is another old saying that goes like this, “Speak with the intent of being understood and not merely heard.”

I am not really a fan of the word police. As efficient as our language could be if we cut down on the “new” words, it sure would not be as much fun. I never would have learned the word “dramastically” or had the opportunity to use it in a sentence.

I will remember though, as I go through my day and talk with people, to speak with the intent of being understood and not merely heard. I will listen with the intent to listen and not with the intent to respond.

If my job is to present the Good News to people, I better make sure that I am communicating well.

Blessings,

Musings on Heaven

Good morning, I pray the day is finding you well.

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately.

Actually, I have been doing a lot of thinking about God, Christ, the Holy Spirit, and Heaven.

This is something that I have been thinking about.

In the beginning was God.

God, as Christians we believe in the trinity. This being said, if we believe in the trinity, we believe that God, Christ and the Holy Spirit are one. Therefore, if we believe that, "In the beginning was God," we believe that, in the beginning was God, Christ, and the Holy Spirit. I know that this is hard thing to wrap one's head around, the more you contemplate it, the deeper it gets and quite frankly we see through the glass darkly and will never get the complete picture of this until we are there with them. Being there with them would suggest, well actually, it doesn't just suggest, it means that we would be in Heaven with God, Christ, and the Holy Spirit. Being in Heaven with God, Christ, and the Holy Spirit also is a lot to wrap one's head around. We have heard many preachers and pastors tell us that heaven will be like a big banquet, with never ending food and never ending praise songs. I would hope that Heaven is more than just eating and singing. As much as I like to eat, and I must confess I like to eat, thus the reason for my current weight loss endeavor. Eating for eternity would get old. I hope that we are not just eating for eternity. The more I think about eating for eternity the more I begin to wonder about it. First of all if all I do in Heaven is eat; isn't that gluttony? Isn't gluttony a sin? I am pretty sure gluttony is a sin. Sin does not reside in Heaven. Secondly, there a multiple schools of thought about who will be in Heaven. One school is that there will only be the souls of people from earth in Heaven. Another school of thought has animals up in Heaven too (How many pastors have heard, "Will my cat Buffy be in Heaven? It sure wouldn't be Heaven if my cat Buffy isn't there.") Other schools of thought have souls from other worlds in Heaven too. Heaven could be quite the place when you start wondering who could be there.

Let's stick with the second school of thought for now.

If all we do is eat, where does the food come from?

If animals are in Heaven, and since we are in Heaven there is no reason to think that we could not communicate with animals, and all we do is eat, I can see a conversation like this going on.

Roger, "Hello Cathy." I am talking to Cathy the cow.

Cathy, "Hello Roger." Cathy the cow is talking to me.

I say, "What are you doing today?"

Cathy says, "Eating."

I say, "Me too."

Cathy says, "What are you eating today?"

I say, "I am so glad you asked, because today I am in charge of the barbecue."

I just do not think that Cathy the Cow would think that is Heaven if she is a vital part of the banquet.

I was in my aqua aerobics class this morning. As I mentioned earlier I am in the middle of a weight loss endeavor. This morning I was doing my water walking, water walking is where you walk in water, duh, with weights. I was obviously lost in thought, at least when I am lost I have an excuse. Being lost in thought is much better than just being lost, at least I think so. Anyway, I was lost in thought and another "water walker," no it wasn't Jesus, this person was in the water not on the water. asks, "What are you thinking about?" I say, "Heaven." and I go into the whole banquet thing. After I say that I did not think Cathy the Cow would think being eaten was part of Heaven my friend says, "Manna, we will eat Manna for eternity." I thought, "that is just ludicrous." First of all, the Hebrews only had to eat Manna for forty years and they were darned tired of it after only forty years. Eating Manna for an eternity would be just awful. Besides Manna means, "What is it?" Can you imagine eating "What is it?" for eternity?

Can you imagine a conversation around Manna?

Phil, a friend of mine in Heaven, we will have nothing but friends in Heaven so this is really a ridiculous statement. Anyway, Phil comes up and says, "What are you having for dinner?

I say, "This."

Phil says, "What is it?"

I say, "Yep."

Phil says, pointing to the Manna, "What is it?"

I say, "Exactly."

Phil, his face is starting to get red and his voice is rising says, "Are you being a smart-butt? What are you eating for dinner?"

I say, "What is it."

Phil, face in contortions says, "What is what, dinner? are you asking what dinner is?"

I say, "No, I know what dinner is."

Phil, visibly upset, just gives me a big huff turns and leaves saying, "I will never talk to you again."

I say, "Are we still friends?"

Phil shouts over his shoulder, "NO."

Now everyone in Heaven is no longer friends; all because of Manna.

This is why we are not eating Manna for eternity.

The whole Banquet theory falls apart pretty quick when you think about it.

I also must confess, I do like to sing. Simply because I like to sing does not mean that I am any good at it. Nor, does it mean that others like to listen to me sing. I, for one, have heard more than my share of bad singing; usually in the form of special music when someone comes forward in church, a sound track is turned on and all of a sudden it is karaoke morning in church. I hope that Heaven is more than singing. Not just for my sake, but for the sake of those standing in earshot of my voice.

When I talk to people about singing in Heaven and tell them that I can't sing they say, "When you get to Heaven God will give you a wonderful voice." When they say this I cannot help but think, "It will be like those Allstate commercials were the little girl is talking to her dad and then all of a sudden her voice changes into this beautiful baritone voice and she says "Allstate, you have the Allstate protection plan." Her father just looks at her in wonderment. I am sure that he is thinking, "Who is this in my daughter and why does my daughter sound like a forty year old man?"

I really do not know if I will be given a new beautiful voice or not; I really do not think that having a new voice or not is really the point of Heaven in the first place.

As a chaplain, I get to listen to lots of people talk about lots of things. I was sitting with a member the other day that had just gotten out of the hospital. He had tried to commit suicide and had been hospitalized. He had just been released, and came to me for help. He needed someone who could help him work through his stuff. He needs a psychologist or psychiatrist. Of course he has no insurance and little money, thus his dilemma. It took me a couple of hours but I was able to find him the help he needed. He still likes to sit with me and talk.
After he leaves, I have another conversation.

I have a conversation with God.

The role is reversed. I do most of the talking and He does the listening.

One of the things that I tell the member that comes to me is that life is worth living even though you do not know all the ins and outs, all the if, ands, or buts of the future.

As I was talking with God, He said that Heaven is much the same way. Heaven is bigger and better than I can ever imagine; even though I do not know all the ins and outs, and the if ands or buts of Heaven.

Life is worth living.

Heaven is worth looking forward to.

Have a wonderful day.

Blessings,

You Don't Want to Bite off More Than You Can Chew

We; Laurie, Levi, Saundra, Abe, and I had a wonderful day yesterday. We went up the Gorge and had a picnic on a bluff overlooking the Columbia River. The day was Sunny and warm and we all had a great time. We had crackers and cheese, fried chicken, grapes…We sat there watching tugboats go by. We sat there and watched trains travel up and down the Gorge. We watched Abe being Abe, which is to say we were watching a dog be a dog. After a few hours, we decided that we would finish the day with an ice cream. We decided it would be fun to go over the Bridge of the Gods, my favorite bridge, and have an ice cream in Cascade Locks. There is a great ice cream shack in Cascade Locks that everyone must go to at least once in their lives. Notes of caution, the sizes of cones are not your usual size.

Ministry is such a funny animal. Every day I come into the YMCA with my list of, “Things to do.” and every day I find that there are things that are not on my list that come to my attention. Some of these things are opportunities that are very good in nature. I try to look at all the opportunities and evaluate them.

Hmm… evaluate, what do I evaluate?

Great question.

My mission is to serve the staff and volunteers of the YMCA, the members that call us home, and the community we live in.

My bulls-eye is the staff and volunteers.

My next ring is the members.

My third ring is the community.

As I evaluate I always keep our mission in the forefront of what we are doing.

We also do not want to try to do something that we will not be successful in doing.

As I said earlier we were in the Gorge yesterday afternoon. We decided to get some ice cream.

Levi and I decided to get a “large swirl cone.”

I should have done a better job of evaluating.



In ministry I do not want to bite off more than I can chew.

Blessings,

My Friend Matthew

Good morning,
I pray the day is finding you well.

I want to tell you a story about a friend of mine.

When Laurie and I bought our home, we came into relationship with the sellers. We had the Rader girls over to our house for an afternoon. I first heard about Caryn’s son Matthew that afternoon.

Matthew is an amazing person. When he was younger, he was a vivacious, outgoing young man that everybody loved. He had an infectious smile and a great personality. He was the type of guy that you just wanted to be around. When Matthew was 19 years old, he had a massive heart attack. Before the doctors could revive him he had oxygen deprivation and he could no long speak or move. In fact, the doctors did not think he would survive, but he did.

Even though Matthew could no long move or speak, that did not stop him. In fact he was just getting started. He had one thing that was not taken from him, his smile. Matthew smiles all the time. His smile is not just a smile, when you sit with him, you could actually feel the love of Christ radiate from him. It is in his being, it was in his smile.

Caryn, Matthew’s mother shared newspaper articles with me about her son. People would come and sit with Matthew when they were depressed. After spending time with Matthew, this person who could not move, could not speak, and all he did was smile; these people would leave the room not depressed anymore. Matthew is an amazing guy.

Matthew reminds me of the Apostle Paul. As impactful as Paul’s ministry was before he was imprisoned; it was after his imprisonment that Paul had his greatest impact. The bars of his cell could not keep him from writing his letters; these are the same letters we read in the New Testament. Paul’s greatest impact was when those who sought to stop him thought they had.

As much as Matthew positively impacted people’s lives will he was still able to move and speak; his greatest impact came when he too was imprisoned, only Matthew was imprisoned in his own mortal body.

Matthew passed away.

I still speak of him in the present tense because I believe in eternal life. All that has happened is that Matthew is no longer imprisoned in a body that is broken. He is now free. I know that Matthew is happy in Heaven. I will miss Matthew, just as everyone who has been touched by this amazing young man will miss him.

I just wanted to tell you a little bit about my friend.

I will be talking with Matthew’s family later today. I have been asked to say a few words at his graveside. I am humbled by the request.

Every so often, we meet people that truly move us and make us want to be better. I am so grateful that I met Matthew, I will try to be better.

Blessings,