Betty called me to talk about "Fancy Shoe People."

 Good morning,

I pray the day finds you well.

I have found out a few things since I started writing again. 

1. People are reading my Breads all over the world.
2. I am hitting a nerve. I am getting a lot of conversational mileage with people from them.
3. My family is reading my thoughts as well. This explains the sudden appearance of little kid scissors, and the disappearance of any sharp object in my house. Have you ever tried to open an Amazon package with kiddy scissors? This will cause all sorts of tapes to play, just say-in.

People are talking about different Breads, as different Breads hit them differently.

My sister Betty (not her real name, but a story always goes better with a name attached). Anyone who knows my sister will know why I named her Betty. She giggles like a certain cartoon character. 

Anyway, Betty called me to talk about "Fancy Shoe People." How she knows that they are trying to help but just take you deeper into the mud. 

Betty is a typical Button. She is very hard on herself. If she is being honest she will say that when she walks into a room she feels as if she is the worst, most vile, sinful person there. And depending on the room, if I am to be honest, she very well may be, but other than being in a room full of newborns I doubt she is. 

Betty is a wonderful person, who does many wonderful things. I have known Betty for most of my life, literally, most of my life. She has always had my back, even during the worst of me, and I will always have hers. 

I know that when she looks in the mirror, she sees a stranger looking back. A face that tells her lies, a face that makes her want to put a mask on. 

I am going to have to do some Chappy work with my sister when I go see her. 

I am going to sit her down at a table, just her and me. I am going to give her a pen and paper and ask her to write all the negative, bad things that the person in her head tells her, yells at her, screams sometimes. I will ask her to give me the paper, and I will read it and then give it back. 

After she finishes writing down all those horrible, hateful things; I am going to put a picture of her as a little girl in front of her. 

I will tell her to take a good hard look at that little girl. 

I am then going to ask her if she would ever tell that little girl any of those horrible things? 

I know Betty won't be able to do that.

I know Betty would never tell that little girl that:

• She is ugly
• She is fat
• She is a loser
• A waste of a life
• A horrible person
• Stupid
• A terrible friend
• A bad sister....

I am then going to ask her, "If she would never tell her little self those things, then why would she tell her big self those things?" 

You see, it isn't the grown-up self those tapes lie to. It is our inner little self, the one that can't fight back. 

I am then going to give Betty a new piece of paper.

I am going to ask her to look at that little girl again and write down all the good things she sees in her. All the things she wished she had heard as a child.

• She is beautiful
• She is smart
• She is funny
• She is a great sister
• She is an awesome friend
• She is going to grow up to be a great mom, a wonderful wife.
• She is going to grow up and positively impact many kids, showing them the love they didn't get at home 

I am then going to take the bad paper away and tell her to keep the good paper. 

Whenever those tapes start to play, she is to take out that piece of paper and tell that little girl all the great things she sees in her. All the good things she is. 

I am going to remind her that this is how I see her; this is how Christ sees her. 

Yep, when I go see my little sister, that is what I am going to do.

I am going to keep writing these Breads. They are painful to write, and they make me confront horrible thoughts, but you know what, they also create space for people to talk to me about stuff that they have been living in pain with for a long time, some for most of their lives. 

I am going to keep writing these Breads, because Betty is worth it.

I love you Betty! 

Blessings,

Your brother Roger