You have got to be kidding me!

 Good morning,

I pray the day finds you well.

You have got to be kidding me!

I made it to dry ground only to find the path parallels the mud bog for as long as the eyes can see.

When I say parallels, I mean it is right next to the mud. One wrong step and I am right back in the mud.

I got unstuck, I almost said that I got myself unstuck, but that would not be true. I had a lot of help along the way. People didn't leave me there, no they stood right beside me until I was able to pull free and start my trudge. They trudged alongside me, going at the pace that I needed to go; letting me talk it out. They listened to me talk, not making sense most of the time, not getting insulted or making it about them. 

They listened mostly.

They interjected occasionally.

They even called me on my crap when I needed to have my crap called on! Never in a shame-based way, no with love in their words. 

Truth with love is a hard thing to master, yet they did. 

I made it to dry ground and find myself looking down a precarious path, 

A path full of hope.

A path with a future.

A path that is right next to the mud. 

I had hoped that it would lead directly away from the mud, but no that is not the case. My path seems to still have danger involved.

The tapes are distant.

The voices are muted. But they are still there.

One of my strengths is context. 

I have always looked to the past to see the future (a trait that would drive Darryl nuts, he is a futurist at least until we realized that I had context and he had futurist in his top five. If you don't know what I am saying, just stay tuned I will talk about that one of these days)

I am making the conscious decision to not look back when it comes to my life and the tapes that play.

I have found that the history of my life, and the tapes that play about it, don't line up.

The tapes have been a big fat lie!

I found that out, by talking with the people that I love, the ones that I feel safe with. 

They were the ones that pointed out the disparities between the tapes, the voices, and the history of my life. 

I am not looking back, only forward. I have different responses ready for if the tapes come back, the voices that try to tell me what a waste I am, and that my life never mattered. 

But I am right next to the mud, and it would be easy to slip, to fall right back into it, and become stuck.

I need to find a friend that will walk this path with me, at least until there is more space between the path and the mud. 

I need to find a friend to walk with me, just for a little while anyway. To remind me to just look forward. to remind me that those tapes, those voices are a lie. 

I have a few people in mind, and I will ask them if they are willing and able to help.

As we talked the other day, I noticed that the mud bog was a lot more crowded than I had first noticed.

Who knows, maybe you were in there with me? 

Or are there still. 

Find someone to come alongside you. 

They are there, you just need the courage to look.

If you are in the mud, look for help.

If you have made it out of the mud, and see a friend who is stuck, go help them. 

These are the things I ponder. 

Blessings,

Roger